The Meaning of Life

The city's best blogger, Greg at Deaths Door, had a great meditation on god, the universe and everything. He asked the age old question:

"why does [God] let bad things happen to good people."

People have been trying to answer that question, or a form of it, for thousands of years. But I submit that it's the wrong question. My question is why don't more bad things happen to everyone?

The way I see it, if a God saved everyone from every bad thing that ever happened, we'd become a super dependent. We'd be no better than cattle, like some kind of cosmic welfare case.

The great prophet Bender had an epiphany about this very subject in an episode Futurama where he actually met god in the center of the universe.
The exchange went something like this:

Bender: Y'know, I was God once.

God: Yes I saw. You were doing well until everyone died.

Bender: It was awful. I tried helping them. I tried not helping them but in the end I couldn't do them any good. Do you think what I did was wrong?

God: Right and wrong are just words. What matters is what you do.

Bender: Yeah I know, that's why I asked if what I did - forget it.

God: Bender, being God isn't easy, if you do too much, people get dependent. And if you do nothing, they lose hope. You have to use a light touch, like a safe cracker or a pickpocket.

Bender: Or a guy who burns down the bar for the insurance money.

God: Yes, if you make it look like an electrical thing. When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.

Good point. And besides, who wants to have everything taken care of? Sure, death and tragedy are painful (that's why they're not called 'joy' and 'happiness'), but they are the contrast to all of the good things in life.

Look, I've got a bottle of a 1997 Brunello in my cellar that I've been waiting years to drink. I'm totally excited about it. I haven't decided when to drink it, but when I do, it's going to be an amazing experience. Do you think I'd be this stoked if I came home every night to a glass of this wonderful elixir?

Maybe, who knows. The point is life is tragic and nobody gets out of it alive. But it's also a gift. If you can get through the bad stuff (which I think is what God is for) you can learn to enjoy all of the Brunello (metaphorically speaking).

tagged: God, meaning of life, Bender, Futurama, Brunello

Young man, there's no need to feel down

I love this picture, courtesy of Get on the Blandwagon.

Those Aussies have a great sense of humor. No further comment needed.

tagged: humor, religion, culture, YMCA, Village People, art, painting

Casa lighting ceremony

I know the Country Club Plaza had its famous lighting ceremony last week which I missed as usual (well, I wouldn't say I missed it, but I wasn't there).

But thanks to the balmy spring weather we've been having, I was able to put lights up on my own casa. I was one of the first on my block to get into the Christmas spirit, and it pleased my Supermodel Wife and 4-year-old daughter immensely.

I don't want to underplay the significance of this. In our first house, it took about 5 years before I started decorating the outside for Christmas. And this year I was particularly apprehensive due to the two-story nature of our new domicile. It's not that I'm afraid of heights, it the depths that make me nervous.

UPDATE: Oh yeah I forgot, I wrote a once-sentence story about this. Let me know what you think.

tagged: holiday, lights, Christmas, Kansas City, Country Club Plaza, decoration

YouPhone: Everybody wants some

I just read the announcement that YouTube and Verizon have inked a deal to provide "selected" YouTube videos on "selected" Verizon cell phones.

This kind of technology seems like a good fit. It's tough to watch a three-hour movie or even a 30-minute TV show on your cell phone, but the short-form, three to 5 minute videos that pervade YouTube would make for a good waiting-in-line-at-the-DMV diversion.

Given that, I'm confident that Verizon will find a way to screw this up. First, you already have to pay $15 to get the limited selection of videos on your phone (assuming your phone is compatible). This is only $15 more than it currently costs to see all of the content on YouTube proper. You think Apple will make this mistake when it integrates YouTube functionality into the next iPod? Me neither.

Next, Verizon will fail to leverage the biggest YouTube benefit. Probably the biggest strength of YouTube is that the site makes it easy to share video. Sure, having the content on the site is big, but even Google Video did that. With YouTube, a simple copy and past lets you embed the video in your website or email it to a friend.

Think Verizon will work that into their phone devices? Me neither.

But, it's a good step forward in making YouTube-type videos more mobile. I hope Sprint and Cingular are paying attention.

tagged: YouTube, Verizon, Sprint, Cingular, mobile, video, Apple, iPod

YouTube Tuesday: Double jointed

I think I need a double joint after watching this dude. Sorry if it grosses you out but, wow... just wow!



tagged: movie, YouTube, video, wierd, gross, controtionist, double jointed, flexible

Bono mot

I caught part of the Bono and The Edge Off the Record interview last night on HBO.

I've been a huge U2 fan since the early '80s. Unlike Rubik's Cubes, blazers with T-shirts and rolled up sleeves, and piano keyboard ties, U2 has managed to stay culturally relevant for my entire adolescent and adult life.

I always felt like I "got" their music and it always seemed to have more substance than most of what passes for art these days.

That's not to say I've agreed with the antics of Bono over the last 10 years or so. He's a great poet, like many of his countrymen, but his dabbling in geopolitical and social causes has struck me as a bit self-important. As if he really thinks he can save the world.

I put up with it, though, for the sake of the aforementioned great music. And in last night's interview, the former Mr. Hewson admitted that sometimes he doesn't know what he's talking about.

Bono and The Edge were discussing the song Bullet the Blue Sky, a political criticism of US foreign policy in El Salvador. Bono said the man who's "face (was) red like a rose on a thorn bush. Like all the colors of a royal flush" was Ronald Reagan, the person Bono blamed for the suffering of the farmers and villagers in El Salvador.

Bono said something to the effect of "I later learned of the horrible affects of communism on the country and that Reagan wasn't solely to blame. I was only seeing part of the picture, but I couldn't understand why these people were being firebombed."

(Note: I paraphrase the above quote. I Googled furiously for a transcript of the interview and couldn't find one. If I find it, I'll correct my quote).

Anyway, it's rare to see someone (especially someone as "self-confident" as Bono who said if he can't understand a concept, it's the fault of the person trying to get said concept through his thick skull) to admit being wrong.

I think the larger lesson is to try to keep an open mind to all sides and not to assume you know all there is to know about a given issue.

Plus, I still dig U2.

tagged: Bono, The Edge, U2, HBO, culture, music, politics

Fellowship of the Funk

The local blogosphere seems to be pretty unanimously agreed that former KCMO auditor Mark Funkhouser is a great candidate for Mayor.

For what it's worth (which isn't much since I don't live in KCMO and can't vote there (legally)), I agree.

But there is something that leaves just a tinge of doubt in my mind. I'm not sure what it is. Can't quite put my finger on it...

tagged: Kansas City, politics, Funkhouser, Mayor, Saruman, Lord of the Rings

They just can't let it go

The other day I noted NBC's recent not-so-subtle foray into the world of product integration and product placement.

My no-duh conclusion is that the networks are trying to find a revenue positive way around the Tivo phenomenon -- that more and more viewers (like me) are skipping commercial breaks thanks to the fast forward button on their DVRs.

And basically, I was okay with it. I even enjoyed the network poking fun at itself in episodes of The Office and 30 Rock.

But c'mon NBC, enough is enough. The network devoted an entire story line in this week's episode of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip (one of my fav shows this year) to justifying to its audience way product placement is necessary and good.

The show featured network exec Jordan McDeere, played by hottie Amanda Peete, lecturing producer Danny Tripp on how placing product ads into the content of the fictional Studio 60 sketch comedy show can help the show save money and jobs.

It was a blatant attempt to guilt the viewing audience into accepting product integration into the television shows.

NBC doesn't seem to realize that this isn't necessary. I like the show because if has interesting characters and excellent writing. And there are plenty of opportunities to introduce product usage into the story lines subtly and effectively.

Explaining it before you do it is just insulting and distasteful. NBC, there are lots of networks and I'm sure all of them face revenues issues. As a viewer, I don't care what your financial problems are.

Put up smart, high-quality content and the revenue will follow. But don't air your dirty in-house problems for the rest of us to see. We have our own, more important things to deal with.

tagged: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, marketing, TV, pop culture, NBC, product placement, advertising

YouTube Tuesday: Kramer confession

By now we've all heard or heard of the Michael Richards' Mel Gibson impression at the Laugh Factory in L.A. earlier this week.

TV's Kramer let fly with a stream of unconsciousness filed with racial epithets hurled at audience members who had heckled him mercilessly during his stand-up "comedy" routine.

No doubt, Richards' tirade was way out of line. As a professional, he should be able to handle hecklers in a way that makes them look stupid, not the other way around.

But to paraphrase Hamlet (author of Shakespeare, the Hollywood smash hit) "I come not to honor Kramer, but to bury him."

After his sincere apology on the David Letterman show last night, I think it's clear that he is contrite. His career is all but over and he's certainly worried about igniting some kind of Rodney King-esque race riot.

The best course of action on all sides of this is to accept Richards' apology and let the healing begin.



tagged: movie, YouTube, video, Kramer, culture, race, racism, Michael Richards, Letterman

Lesson learned

It was great seeing our friends from Panama over the weekend.

Haven't seen P since we all lived in Liberal back in the day. She now has a few more PhD's, a new career, a terrific husband and two amazing sons.

Her oldest son is the same age as our 4-year-old daughter, so we though it would be fun to take them to the Robots exhibit at Union Station. I was happy to see so many people there on a Sunday afternoon. It wasn't packed wall-to-wall by any means, but there were enough people that you had to wait in line in several places.

Anyway, we took the kids through the Robots exhibit and then, since it was the same ticket, through Science City. After a few hours of exploration and education, we decided it was time for a break and a snack before heading out to our next stop.

We grabbed a couple of tables at the downstairs snack bar. I bought a bottle of water and some of those roasted candied almonds. I knew my kid had never had them before and thought she might like to try something new.

So I sit down, open the package and my daughter immediately grabs an almond. At the same time, her new friend also grabs an almond and pops it in his mouth. Thinking I have a hit here, I offer some almonds to my Supermodel Wife sitting next to me. Then I offer some to the boy's mother who politely declines, and adds to make sure I don't give any to her son.

Wait a minute, he already grabbed one. "Are you serious?" she asks.

"Yeah, he grabbed one as soon as I opened the pack."

"He's very allergic to almonds," she says, as she bolts for the prescription-strength Benadryl.

Now I'm thinking, HOLY CRAP! Here's this family who has been traveling for a week with two young boys all the way from Panama, like they need any more stress, and I've just sent their son into a potentially life-threatening anaphylactic shock. I sit stupidly by, offering my bottle of water to wash the boy's mouth while his mother expertly doses him with the Benadryl.

"Usually his mouth swells and starts to itch really bad, then he vomits," P said as she cleaned his mouth. She has obviously seen this before.

Almost immediately, the child begins to rub the inside of his lip. His mother urges him not to scratch it, that the itching will pass soon when the medicine kicks in.

Luckily, possibly because of the sugary coating on the almonds and certainly due to Mom's rapid response, the reaction is mild. No vomiting, no ambulance, no vacation-ruining visits to the ER, only some slight swelling, redness and itching.

I continue to apologize as profusely as I can until I get the sense that I'm starting to annoy P and that I should just let it drop.

But I make a mental note in ALL CAPS, bold face and underlined:
NEVER OFFER YOUR SWEET NUTS TO STRANGE KIDS WITHOUT FIRST CHECKING WITH THEIR MOTHER!

tagged: Union Station, Robots, Kansas City, Panama, allergy, almond, Benadryl, anaphylactic shock