Thursday, November 19, 2009


I was doing my dadly duty last week, taking my 7-year-old daughter to a school skating party.

She had missed the previous skating party and was totally jonesing for a skate. She was so eager to go to the party that we were able to hold it over her blackmail-style and get some extra good behavior and chores "or else your not going to get to go skating."

Anyway, we get to the skating rink, put on her skates and let her out on the floor to knock herself out -- not literally of course, she's not a great skater but she only fell two or three times. And with the exception of a quick snack break, she spent pretty much the whole time on shuffling around the skate floor.

Toward the end of the skating party, I was standing on the carpet waiting for her to come out to return the skates. She rolled off the floor and we went over to a bench to change shoes.

She pulls me down to say something into my ear.

"One of those bigger kids out there said the 'F Word'" she said.

I just kind of blinked and I think I may have done a short sigh.

"Well, just don't listen when you hear that," I replied. I was pretty calm. I said it in the same tone you might use when saying "Just remember to wash your face after the dog licks all of the peanut butter off."

You see, I'd done this quick calculation in my mind. I don't want to fly off the handle and make "The F Word" seem like it's this big magical mystery word. I don't want to encourage her to say the word by banning her from uttering it. It's human nature to want to do something that someone tells you you can do.

I didn't want to turn "The F Word" into some kind of forbidden fruit.

But I also want to let her know that I do not approve of her using that word at her age.

But later, when we got home, I know she was still curious. Out of earshot of her Supermodel Mother, she came and whispered in my ear once again...

"Do you know what the F Word is," she asked, as if she were privy to secret information that I didn't have. "Do you want me to tell it to you?"

"No" I said. "I don't want to hear it and I don't want you to say it."

I don't think the issue is over. I'm sure she heard it at school. In subsequent conversations, she implied that one of the boys (Boys... sheesh... don't even get me started!) in her class had been saying it.

Well, I guess first grade is when you start learning these things...

tagged: , , , , ,


  1. not looking forward to this conversation my

  2. What is with comments seemgingly being cut off around these parts lately? I swear I saw one like jason's over on MM's today, or something. It must be an iPhone thing. ;)

    My family was not a cussing family. My mom rarely said "damn", and only branched out to "shit" now and again after my sister and I were in our 20's.

    Regardless, I was a fountain of curse as soon as I moved out of the house, and into a dorm when I was 18. Why? I don't know. I think it's just who I was meant to be. So I don't fight it much.

  3. I have only one rule-whatever you hear -don't reapeat it. My daughter is allowed to watch anything she wants on TV and the words can be heard.I don't cuss at home and neither did my parents but I can go head-to-head with anyone in two languages.Wait until you have to explain gay marriage

  4. I always wanted to know what my three heard precisely, if for no other reason, than I didn't want them thinking the "F-word" was "fart," then dropping the big one at Thanksgiving dinner or something.



Your turn to riff...