Today's category: Profiles in GYAHHH!
Say what you will about the Internet. It's divisive and leads to unchecked, destructive tribalism. It's an amazing tool for communication, offering us unprecedented exposure to different cultures and a chance to draw closer as one world race. Both views, while contrary to each other, are valid.
But one thin you can always say about the Internet is that its interesting. Well, it's been its usual shocking and gross week out there on the Internet, so proceed with caution.
- Woman dies from brain-eating amoeba after using neti pot with filtered tap water
I heard that one time a brain-eating amoeba tried to attack Meesha, but it starved to death. #sickburn
Also, follow Nancy Reagan's advice and stop putting bugs up your nose.
- Kona Community Hospital shuts down due to scabies outbreak
"Kona Community Hospital shut down today due to a severe outbreak of scabies, a highly contagious skin condition caused by tiny burrowing mites…"
Dudes. These are tiny mites… burrowing into your SKIN! This sort of thing is how the Justinian Plague started, right?
- Asian beetles disguised as ladybugs burrow into your dog's mouth
If I see them trying to migrate into my house this winter, I'll be sure collect them and feed them to my neighbor's crazy barking dogs (I'm kidding I would never! I'm a dog person!).
- Man coughs up bizarre blood clot shaped exactly like part of a lung
Okay, it was a blood clot that looked like a piece of his lung... because it had been lodged in his bronchial tree and become a cast IN BLOOD of the inside of his fricken' LUNG!