Monday, February 06, 2006

Razors edges

My grandmother is 94 years old. Almost a century.

She's seen America blossom from an agrarian upstart to a techno-superpower. From the nascence of flight to the moon landing, the splitting of the atom and the printed circuit, her life has born witness to technological advances that would seem like miracles just 200 years ago.

And, as of Sunday night, I witnessed the unveiling of one of those advances as well.

Fusion.

No, not nuclear fusion. Rather, the new Fusion razor from Gillette. This astounding advance in shaving technology was launched with a Super Bowl ad that was glitzy enough to send metrosexual men everywhere into a twitter.

The new device one-ups the four-bladed battery-powered Schick Quattro by adding an additional cutting blade, as well as a computer-controlled battery-powered vibrating motor. What will they think of next (lemme guess, six blades)?

But this latest escalation of the blade wars gave me pause to ask myself: Just because we can develop a five-bladed razor, should we?

I remember when I was a young lad and first began to grow fuzz on my chin, I was content to use a single-bladed razor. Then, when Gillette launched the radical new two bladed Sensor, I became hooked on the $5-dollar blade refills. It truly did seem to give me a closer shave.

But five blades!?!? Do we really know what we're getting into? I mean, where will it all end? How can we be sure this five-bladed technology will be used for good instead of evil.

I seriously think it's time to rethink our national addiction to multi-bladed, computer-chip-controlled vibrating razors. We have to think of the future. What kind of clean-shaven world do we want to leave for our children and grandchildren?

I hereby call for the government to step in and regulate the development of multi-bladed razors as well as the research into other advanced hair removal technology. Please join me by writing to your senators and congressmen (don't bother with the congresswomen), to insist upon the establishment of an independent committee to study the issue.

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Another side

I wanted to post a huge thanks for Front Bumper's comments on this post and for his post on a similar topic on his blog.

Particularly, it's encouraging to note the list of Syrian bloggers who have the kind of response a reasonable person might expect. The sentiments of these people and more like them represent the best hope for peace and progress.

Here is a partial list with some quotes:

The Damascene Blog
Everything went well until the mobs took out to the streets on Saturday. It is quite unfortunate to see that the Muslim street is still controlled by extremist ideas that are, in fact, very un-Islamic. The mobs harmed the cause and gave another blow to the image of Islam. If this is what protests will be like, they should stop immediately. As long as the extremists control the street, moderate Muslims will fail to defend their religion properly and will always find themselves between a rock and a hard place.

Earth to Omar
I don’t get it! If anything we are now in a worse situation than we were before. I can just imagine millions of people in Europe right now saying “see, I told you so”. What bothers me is how easy it is for a bunch of thugs to come along and create such a horrible image for Arabs. The people who commit such acts are the ones who fuel the western media with excellent news stories which further echo Arab fanaticism and ignorance.

Bits & Bites of Syria
I felt furious for this kind of response. This is not us, or at least, not what I thought we were not!

I welcomed, both, the commercial and diplomatic actions in response to the cartoons that mocked the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), and for once, I felt that we are reacting in a civilized manner! Not any more!

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Sunday, February 05, 2006

Making Muhammad proud

From the AP:
  • Muslims rampaged Sunday in Beirut, setting fire to the Danish Embassy,
  • flames and smoke billowed from the building. Security officials said at least 30 people were injured.
  • lobbing stones at a Maronite Catholic church
  • demonstrators in Syria charged security barriers outside the Danish and Norwegian embassies in Damascus and sent the buildings up in flames
The Prophet Muhammad must be so proud of these acts. They are sure to advance the cause of Islam all over the world.

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Friday, February 03, 2006

When the Shiite hits the fan

I heard and read about the recent demonstrations by the Muslim communities in Europe and the Middle East.

What is stirring up the controversy? Abuses at Abu Grahib? High unemployment and racism in Paris? The rising civilian death toll in Iraq?

Nope. All of the recent protests and outrage are the result of a Danish editorial cartoon. The cartoon depicts the Prophet Muhammad wearing a turban with a fuse attached, as if it were a bomb. The caricature was picked up and published by several newspapers throughout Europe and the Middle East.

Of course any reasonable Muslim would be offended, just as Christians are offended when Jesus is depicted in unflattering caricatures.

But the reactions in Europe and the middle east are, how shall I say, extreme. For example, according to the Associated Press, 150 demonstrators in Indonesia hurled eggs at the building housing the Danish Embassy, then stormed in, pushing past security guards.

The problem is that all of this outrage is misplaced. The editorial cartoon is the reflection of a world view that has developed as a result of the actions of extreme element of the religion.

There should be outrage by Muslims, but is should be directed inward (in-rage?) toward the people in their religion who adopt violent and terroristic tactics, thus undermining the message of peace, love and understanding from mainstream Muslims.

Grand Ayatollah Ali al-Sistani, the top Shiite cleric in Iraq, hit the nail near the head when he said the militant Muslims bore part of the blame for distorting Islam's image.

According to the AP, he referred to "misguided and oppressive" segments of the Muslim community and said their actions "projected a distorted and dark image of the faith of justice, love and brotherhood."

What I would like to see is a call by the Muslim leadership, both abroad and in the U.S., for large demonstrations to denounce the militant edges of the Islam. That would go much farther than burning a Danish flag.

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Thursday, February 02, 2006

Why I play golf

A lot of people I talk to, particularly women, don't get the point of golf.

"You're hitting a little white ball," they say. "You hit it, walk over to where it lands, and hit it again. What's the point."

For those people, I'm publishing 7 reasons why I play golf. I think you'll agree that this list makes a compelling argument.

Reason #1
Reason #2
Reason #3
Reason#4
Reason #5
Reason #6

And perhaps one of the most important reasons of all...
Reason #7
Brings new meaning to the phrase "A hole in one."

Mad props to my supermodel sister-in-law for the tip.

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Peanut Butter Jelly Time

It's an oldie but a goodie, and it still makes me laugh. I just needed to smile today.


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Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Not fit for print

I read today that Knight-Ridder newspapers' fourth quarter earnings were down 22% from last year. It turns out that the shareholders of the company will only get a paltry $1.24 for every share they own instead of the healthy $1.38 they received in the fourth quarter of 2004.

I happen to own 10 shares of Knight-Ridder, so you can imagine how disappointed I am. I really had plans for that extra $1.40 (I've got my eye on the Wendy's 99-cent menu).

But I guess it just goes to show that you can't hold back progress, what with the growing number of blogs and consumer media which do a better job reporting than the so-called journalists. The shareholders of the horseshoe nail manufactures probably felt the same way when the automobile came along. ("Automobile" is another word for "car." Gotta explain these things for people like Tony).

And, when all-around smart guy Dave Berry proclaims that "newspapers are dead," well you pretty much have to stand up and take notice of that.


Of course, I'll keep my newspaper stock. I might have lost that $1.40 over last year's earnings, but I still earned 12.4 junior bacon cheeseburgers.


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Monday, January 30, 2006

YouTube Tuesday: Somewhere Over the Rainbow

One of the reasons I love using my iMac is because it's so easy to create cool things... like this music video I did of our 3-year-old daughter. Enjoy.


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Friday, January 27, 2006

How to eat Freyed Oprah


Ms. Oprah Winfrey blasted James Frey the other day on her show. Frey, you may recall, is the author of A Million Little Pieces, the tale of a reformed drug addict and his epic struggle to return home after being lost in the Alaskan wilderness (at least, that's what I understand from reading the cover of the book).

The book so moved Oprah that she vaulted it to the top of her Oprah Winfrey Book Club back in September, stating that "I laughed, I cried. It was better than Cats."

Of course that was all before intrepid Web reporters discovered that most of the book was a complete fabrication. It turns out, for example, that Frey didn’t really lasso a tornado and tie it down with lightening bolts with the help of Babe the Big Blue Ox as he claims in the book.

Now Oprah claims she feels betrayed by Frey, and that Frey betrayed “millions of readers.”

And to add exclamation point, Frey and his book have been kicked out of the Oprah Winfrey Book Club. Take that, you lying bastard.

For his part, Frey was contrite.

"I made a mistake," Mr. Frey told the New York Times, adding that he had developed a tough-guy image of himself as a "coping mechanism" to help him deal with the psychological damage he suffered during a cold night spent in the company of a couple of cowboys on Brokeback Mountain.

Frey also expressed regret at being kicked out of the book club.

"There's no comfort in knowing that the 14 million members of Oprah's book club have already bought out the first pressing of the book at $20 per copy," Frey said, adding "Oh, wait, yes there is."

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Thursday, January 26, 2006

From the new Moleskine

Here's a quickie sketch I did from a pic I took during a trip to SF last summer. It's amazing how much fog they have in the summer.

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