In yet another sign that spring has arrived early (Punxsutawney Phil my ass!), the KC metro area currently under a tornado watch. As far as I know (which isn't very far) it's the first of the "Tornado Season" (whatever that is).
I don't have much respect for tornadoes. In fact, I kind of feel I've been ripped off by tornadoes. I really think tornadoes owe me one. You see, in my more than 30 years as a resident of Kansas, I've never seen a tornado first-hand.
What a gyp.
Everybody says that tornadoes are all scary and exciting, but I couldn't tell you that. In fact, one of the conspiracy theories I subscribe to is that tornadoes don't really exist. They're just a myth, like the Yetti or its North American cousin the Sasquatch. Tornadoes are an invention of old wives tales and Hollywood special effects.
So come on, tornadoes. Give my birthright as a Kansan. Make with the blowing and the swirling and the lifting-up-my-house-and-
Just don't do it during The Sopranos (debuts March 12, 9 p.m. diggity!).
tagged: television, weather, tornado, Kansas, Wizard of Oz, midgets, Sopranos, Punxsutawney Phil, spring, Sasquatch, Yetti