Monday, December 08, 2008


Hey people in case you haven't noticed, the economy is bad.

It's so bad that the KU basketball program has decided to lay off three refs this year. I mean it's rough. A buck is so hard to come by that Walt Bodine has taken a job moonlighting as The Crypt Keeper just to make ends meet.

But over the weekend I saw a true sign of economic meltdown while on a quest for super cheap headphones for my six-year-old daughter to destroy use.

What was this sign? I'm glad you asked. Allow me to illustrate via camera phone:

That's right, Big Lots is having a FREAKIN' LIQUIDATION SALE!!!

Now, I don't know if you've ever shopped at a Big Lots. This is the bottom feeder of the U.S. retail distribution system. So if the American consumer-driven economy were an ocean, all of the chum deemed inedible by big fish like Crate & Barrel, Restoration Hardware or FAO Schwartz, would filter down to smaller fish like Target, K-Mart and Walmart.

The dregs unworthy of even these "value" retailers sinks to the bottom of the sea, where Big Lots picks it ups, dusts if off and puts it on the shelf and ludicrously low prices. This place is one step up from the weekly Lee's Summit swap meet.

You always hear that when the economy starts to sag (much like Larry Moore's chins), consumers flock to the value (cheap) retailers. Yet, here in good ol' OP, the throngs of shoppers seeking disposable grass trimmers aren't enough to keep the doors open.

Still, I could be misreading this. It could be that the store is closing due to the long-rumored "renovation" of the strip mall at 95th and Nall. I hope that's the case and that in a few months we'll have a newer, brighter Big Lots to get cheap junk from.

If the economy keeps going the way it is, we'll need it.

PS -- I got the headphones. Four bucks.

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  1. LOL sooo you call for the panic alarms without even doing a little research :)

  2. Logtar,
    Of course! Knee-jerk reactions are my specialty.

  3. Just came back from Big Lots in Olathe,I am there at least twice a month keeping the bottom of economy moving.

  4. let me wash this silt out of my eyes, thats better. Big L's is the shit. I got a pink foil xmas tree for 9 bucks. Nothin says Happy b-day lil jeebus like a pank tree. no homo on the tree, I just like guady, whiskey tango decor. Just stay away from the stuff with sound a like names. Like OweO cookies or jolly rangers. I think that shit has lead in ti.

  5. lead in it, I mean. Sorry must be those cookies.

  6. Yeah, I saw that sign last week, and since the rest of the center has been empty for, oh, 2 years now, and they finally have a trailer on site, I took it as the clue that the reno is about to begin. I hope I hope I hope...

    Actually, I'm kinda sad about it. There was a part of me that wanted to buy that center, reno it, and lease it. Dammit...(That goal is at least 5 years away still.)

  7. Sadly, I must say that Big Lots closed here at least a year ago. So the fact that your big city store is shutting its doors must truly spell doom and disaster for economic life as we know it.

    Plus, I'm really pissed I can't find my xtreme-cheap wrapping paper and tape this year. Grrr.


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