Thursday, April 26, 2007

FWD: You do the math

A buddy of mine sent me this in a forwarded email.

I'm not sure who the original author is, but it's hard to argue with this analysis. If you know who wrote this originally, let me know.
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver, who cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her.

This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out is window
and gave the woman the finger.

"Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and
wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic,
and here's why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.

That's 96 miles each day.

Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper.

Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.

There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.

That works out to 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.

That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day.

Statistically, females drive half of these.

That's 18,000 women drivers!

In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS.

That's 642.

According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.

That's 449.

According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide.

That's 98.

And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.

That's 33.

According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has
a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Give her the finger? I don't think so

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  1. Ya know, I have been trying really hard to curb my road rage lately.

    This is incredibly useful information!


  2. can't argue with logic. nice.

  3. Here's some more useful information. Loved yours !

    Maybe the following story will reduce the problem and discourage the tailgaters. I agree with you about not flipping off. We have a 12 mile stretch of two lane road through mountains with grades and turns. I pull over even if it means pulling into a driveway where I have to come to a complete stop.

    Who's Afraid of the Big Bad trucks ?

    Great story ! The other day a guy driving an oxygen delivery truck who was sick and tired of his job and sick and tired of big monster pickup trucks tailgating him came up with a solution as he set out for his last run.

    He rigged up a release valve trigger for several of the large tanks, so that the resultant cloud of oxygen would go directly backwards into the grille of the offending truck.

    When the pure oxygen went into the air intake of the trucks he sucker-baited, the mix was so rich and powerful that the trucks blew up their engines. I heard he managed to blow up at least four or five before he ran out of oxygen. Being a good guy, he still made his deliveries to his patients of their normal requirements.


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