YouTube Tuesday: See you soon, space cowboy…

I read the other day about Netflix working on a new live-action adaptation of Cowboy Bebop and immediately became stoked.

Sure, the Netflix track record for this kind of thing is a bit uneven. But in this case I'm more than willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. This genre-blending Sci-Fi/western/jazz/noir anime was pretty groundbreaking when it came to the USA back in the pre-Y2K era. And when I heard about the Netflix remake, I went back and binge-watched the series (available to stream on Hulu, ironically).

The show really holds up well, not least for its amazing soundtrack. Let's hope they get a release date out ASAP.

Everybody kneeds somebody

Can someone tell me just what in the wide world of sports is going on in this country? I am so confused by the news these days. Admittedly, it's likely because I don’t pay close enough attention. 

But c’mon, can you blame me? It’s all just re-runs of the most generic non-reality show ever, but not as entertaining. It’s the same stuff over and over. Everyone’s offended and outraged by something someone else did. And every Offended Group, in turn, must defend their offendedness by doing something at least as offensive to the offending party.

Lather, rinse, repeat... ad nauseam.

It’s to the point where the actions are so trivial that I just can’t summon the interest to pay attention. 

Don’t get me wrong. I think the issues are vitally important. Concepts of equal rights for all humans, and ensuring and defending those rights, are of existential criticality to our (so-called) republic.

But those issues aren’t really being discussed. Rather, we’re stuck on a dumb su-su-pseudo-debate about what symbols mean and whether they're appropriate for high school girls' beer pong games. I used to think symbols were really important,  that they could help communicate noble ideals like Purity and Valor and Justice. But I think we’re now living in a post-symbol society. We lack the ability to decide on what a symbol represents, or once decided, to agree on what is really meant by that representation, or to acknowledge that a symbol can have different meanings to different people and just move on.

This whole NFL players kneeling thing is a good example.

For years we’ve been taught that it’s a great sign of respect to kneel in front of something. It goes all the way back to at least 2011 when the world was introduced to Wess DeRoss, king of Dragonopia on the hit HBO kids cartoon Thronger Games. 
In case you haven’t seen it, the show (which is HBO’s biggest money maker since “Sopranos In the City” --  the touching tale of a Mafia man looking for love in New York) follows the life of a little boy and his pet dragon, Puff Daddy, as they navigate the tricky politics of their fantasy world.

It’s full of hilarious hijinks and poignant moments of honesty. But one recurring theme through all 16 seasons has been that you show respect by “bending the knee” to your liege lords. Failure to bend the need, in fact, is a sign of disrespect bad enough to get you dragon-torched!

But now The Internet is in a monkey shit fight about whether kneeling is disrespectful. It’s as if they’ve never even heard of Degeneras Cardigan, Breaker of Winds and Mother of Dragsters, whose magical unicorns head-spear anyone who doesn’t bend the knee. 

I mean, get with the program, The Internet.

If you ask me, we all need to follow the example of Noble King Geoffrey Bratlian, The Kind. He never had a bad word to say about anyone. He always tries to see every issue from every perspective. Check out this quote from Season 6, episode 12 “Death of a Mockingjay”

Noble King Bratlian, The Kind

First of all, if you can learn a simple trick, Scout, you'll get along a lot better with all kinds of folks. You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view … until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

Now that’s the kind of understanding we need more of on The Internet.

So, I guess the solution is for everyone, including NFL players, to go back and read all 12 volumes of the “The Ballad of Fire and Ice” and report back to me whether John Frost ever made it all the way to Chirstmastown.

Don't know much about history…

Say what you will about the new Netflix pricing changes/fiasco, they still have some really good, not to mention educational, video content.

The other night I logged in through our Wii to watch a fascinating documentary about ancient Persia. And while I still believe our civilization is accelerating downward and that my kids will probably be the last generation to truly benefit from the heights we've reached, these heights are really impressive.

The shear amount of information and analysis that is at our fingertips is mind boggling. Just a few watts of power and a half dozen click was enough to bring up an extensive 2-hour program about a little known chapter in the long history of ancient Persia.

The documentary, narrated by Hollywood's hunky Jake Gyllenhaal, told the story about a Persian king and his efforts to keep his family together, build a dynasty and thwart schemes and coup attempts by those who would usurp his throne.

This fascinating history isn't something we covered in World History back in high school.

At the center of the king's efforts to maintain control of his empire was a magical dagger that could give its wielder control over the flow of time itself!

Needless to say, I was blown away by the amazing historical account and by the fact that very few people in our increasingly superficial country are even aware of these events.

But what blew me away even more was the revelation that people in ancient Persia spoke a language and dialect that sounds almost exactly like English spoken with a fake British accent.

I know what you're thinking, you would expect a Persian accent, or maybe something that sounded like a Greek accent or something. But no, it's a British accent that all the ancient people seem to have.

Amazingly, it's the same dialect that was spoken by Senators, Legionaries and gladiators during the Ancient Roman empire and by the Pharaohs and Jewish leaders of the Ancient Egyptian dynasties.

I tell you, the more I learn about history, the more amazing it is.


tagged: Netflix, movie, Prince of Persia, history, Gladiator, Egypt, Jake Gyllenhaal

Breaking Schnack

You remember a few weeks ago when the guy from Lenexa disappeared in Shawnee Mission Park?

Then a bunch of family and friends scoured the park looking for him? But after weeks of searching they couldn't find him and gave up?

Then last week he was found wandering down a trail sunburned, bug-bitten and dehydrated but otherwise unharmed?

No? You don't remember? Doesn't ring a bell? Well, here's the gist:

Police said Larry Schnackenberg, 58, has been found along a walking trail in Shawnee, Kan. A security officer, Rick Reynolds, who has known Schnackenberg for 15 years, found him on Wednesday … walking along a trail in the 6100 block of Barker Road, police said.
…
It was July 8 when Schnackenberg disappeared. His car and wallet were found at Shawnee Mission Park, just south of the trail. Police used K-9s and helicopters to search the park and more than 600 volunteers spent two days conducting their own search. Outside of his car, there had been no trace of Schnackenberg…

And that's basically where we find ourselves today. As the SOB points out, there was a lot of what industry people call "media weight" behind this, and we've been left with a rather unsatisfying ending.

Well, I'm here to rectify that. I have what I think is a pretty solid theory about what really happened.

Now, I'm not a cop, or a police investigator, or "security officer" or any kind. I don't have years of experience tracking down missing persons and/or pets. But I do have years of experience watching cop shows and such on TV. And based upon that, I can say with a fair amount of certainty that Schnackenberg's "disappearance" was a ruse.

My theory is based upon the fact that a well-educated, middle-aged suburban man faced with the prospect of death by lung cancer will turn to the production of methamphetamine as a way to build a nest egg to provide for his family after he dies.

This is well documented in any number of situations. What tends to happen is that said individual, under pressure from "businessmen" higher up in his distribution chain, will need to take an extended period away from his family to ramp up production.

Typically, he'll drive his RV-turned-meth lab into the Chihuahuan Desert to produce his quota of methamphetamine. This could take anywhere from a week to three weeks depending on the demands of his wholesalers.

But then, because his occupation is a secret to his family and friends, he has to find a way to account for his disappearance. This he does by taking off all of his cloths and wandering into a public place to be discovered, confused and disoriented but mostly unharmed, by local authorities or passers by.

I wouldn't be surprised to see Schnackenberg invoke a "fugue state" defense caused by some generic medical condition, if any public statement is made at all.

Well, that's my theory. I can't guarantee 100 percent accuracy and some details might be different. But if I know my TV dramas (and I can assure you that I do), that I'm pretty sure some version of this is what happened.

And now you know the rest of the story.

Good day.

tagged: headlines, Johnson County, Lenexa, Kansas, Shawnee Mission Park, Schnackenberg, Breaking Bad, fugue state

Bullitt list -- 07.01.09

Today's category: Speaking of...

• So some geniuses at a sex conference in Amsterdam (yeah, big surprise) have announced that having sex every day can increase a couple's odds of conceiving a child. The study was led by Australia's King of the Obvious David Greening of IVF Sydney (IVF stands for "I value fucking").
  
  The study also had some other surprising findings:
  • The use of alcohol can help lead to daily sexual intercourse.
  • Avoiding the use of contraceptives can significantly increase the odds of conceiving a child.
  • Australian men really, really like participating in these kinds of studies.
    
    
• And speaking of children, I took my kid to go see the new Pixar animated feature UP the other day. Pretty good flick. I liked it. I give it a thumbs up and a recommendation.
  
  But one thing really stood out to me almost from the beginning of the movie. The character Russell has an amazing resemblance to a local KC blogger. See if you agree. Here's a pic of the character from the movie.
  And here's a pic of someone who, in my opinion, could have been separated from Russell.
  So whadyathink Internet? Am I right or am I right.
  


• And speaking of uncanny resemblances (and movies), Sacha Baron Cohen's latest joint, Bruno, is set to open in theaters on July 10. Judging by the trailers, it's pretty much the same thing we saw in Borat, but instead of a fictitious moronic Kazakh journalist making fun of people, it's a fictitious moronic Austrian gay male supermodel making fun of people.
  
  Pretty derivative, since the whole moronic male supermodel thing was done to death by Ben Stiller in Zoolander eight years ago.
  
  
• And speaking about being done to death, it seems like celebrities are dropping like flies these days. Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson (if you believe the media stories) Billy Mays... they all make it seem like being a celebrity is a death sentence anymore.
  
  The truth is, being a human is a death sentence. And I've got news for you, there are going to be more and more frequent celebrity deaths in the years ahead. You see in our celebrity-obsessed culture we're suffering from a glut of "celebrities." It's getting to the point that, not far in the future, everyone will be a celebrity.
  
  C'mon people, have some standards. Having an internet video show doesn't make you a celebrity.


• And speaking of internet video, Bloomberg reported the other day that popular programs like The Simpsons are now commanding higher advertising rates on websites like Hulu.com and TV.com than they are on prime time television.
  
  It looks like advertisers are getting wise to the facts that a) people just skip through the ads on the DVR/Tivo, and 2) people actively seeking out content online are loyal fans and more valuable as an audience than people passively watching content on TV.

tagged: Bullitt, movies, Up, Bruno, Zoolander, Sacha Baron Cohen, Ben Stiller, Ben Stiller, pop culture, Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Hulu, TV, The Simpsons

Paddle game as metaphor

If you guys haven't been watching Mad Men on AMC, then I can only conclude that you a) don't have a TV, b) have a TV but don't know how to use it, c) are one of the slobbering idiots responsible for convincing the TV networks that America needs more Deal or No Dancing with America's Top Survivor Idol shows.

Seriously.

I caught a three or four episodes of the first season when they aired, but could never figure out the schedule enough to make it "appointment" TV. Luckily, during a recent staycation, my Supermodel Wife and I discovered the entire first season on Time Warner Cable's ON Demand service.

Season one was fantastic. We watched all of the episodes before jumping in to season two.

Because the first season was so good, I half expected a drop-off for the second season. Let me just say that I continue to be surprised and impressed. I appreciate how producer and writer Matthew Weiner takes risks with all of the characters. In one episode, the audience is led to feel sympathy for a one character and revile another. Then, later, the roles become reversed.

And there are so many subtle jokes woven into the production -- jokes that the characters themselves aren't aware of but that are more of a wink or a nudge from the directors to the audience.

One example from this week's episode is when one Pete Campbell, a junior account exec at the ad firm, is giving a semen sample at the fertility clinic. He enters the private room with a sample cup, reviews some of the "literature" available to help get him in the mood, then...

The scene cuts to one of the firm's partners hitting a paddle game ball in his office. An obvious metaphor for what the junior exec is doing at the moment. Priceless.

This attention to subtlety and detail (the 1960s universe is meticulously recreated from the characters' wardrobe to the ubiquitous cigarette smoke, chauvinism and minibars) make this series stand apart from 90 percent of the fare currently being broadcast.

This series is a great piece of work, which means that it will probably be canceled after this season. So start watching it while you can. It's just too good to last.



tagged: Mad Men, AMC, television, advertising, Don Draper, Pete Campbell, pop culture

GENERATION KILL

It's been a long time since HBO has had a decent series.

The subscription network was hitting home runs regularly with the likes of The Sopranos, Band of Brothers, Deadwood, Entourage and (for some people, I guess) Sex in the City.

But ever since the series so-called finally of The Sopranos, their offerings have been pretty boring and forgettable. The network's recent series, Tell Me You Love Me and In Treatment, seem to be an exploration into how boring other peoples' psychoses can be (although, Tell Me You Love Me earns a pass for the full-frontal nudity).

But I was really pleased with the initial episode of Generation Kill, the seven-part miniseries that follows an elite squad of Marines through the first 40 days of the Iraq war. It is based on the book of the same name by Evan Wright, an embedded journalist writing for Rolling Stone during the invasion.

The production did a great job of keeping showing the tedium of pre-invasion dessert life in Kuwait -- how soldiers dealt with heat, boredom, training equipment shortages and questionable leadership -- as they prepared to be the tip of the spear into Iraq.

The anti-military bias, if there is one, is only very subtle, and -- at least in the initial episode -- the narrative seems to be more concerned with presenting the day-to-day lives of the men on the front line, than with overt political statements about the war itself.

The violence in the first episode was pretty tame as well, especially when compared to The Sopranos and Band of Brothers. Of course the war is just starting, so I expect this to get a little more intense.

Overall, I'm looking forward to seeing the remaining episodes, and I'm keeping the DVR set.



tagged: HBO, Generation Kill, Sopranos, Band of Brothers, Tell Me You Love Me, In Treatment, Iraq, Marines

You say tornado, I say tor-NOT-o

I'm a little surprised at all of the blog reaction to the so-called tornado so-called coverage of the local so-called news media last night.

I mean, we've all pretty much been in this town long enough to know that, given a stiff breeze, the local weather mediots will pre-empt your favorite TV show to tell you the sky is falling. Nothing new there. Hey, at least they don't interrupt the commercials, right?

Beating up on the so-called news so-called media is fun, but at this point it's become the dead horse of the local internets. Besides, you shouldn't be watching so much TV anyway.

What I want to take a few swipes at is the geniuses who run the tornado sirens around town.

My family and I were on our way home after a meeting with a volunteer group we're involved with yesterday evening. We had just decided to make a quick stop at Home Depot when the first sirens went off.

We flipped on the weather coverage on one of the local AM stations (can't remember which one it was, probably 980) to hear the dreaded news that the world was ending. But it was quite to the contrary...

The announcer was telling us that "the tornado warning for Johnson County has been lifted" -- note that this is happening as the sirens are going off. The announcer noted it as well: "The sirens are going off all over Overland Park, but the National Weather Service is telling us that the tornado warnings have been allowed to expire."

It seems the announcer was just as confused as I was (and that's hard, because I'm always pretty damned confused).

You see, what I don't get is, why turn on the siren if there's no tornado in the first place. People are heading for the root cellar and saying their last goodbyes when they hear those sirens. But not only was there no tornado, there wasn't even a tornado warning or watch. WTF?

Look, I already have an unhealthy disregard for tornadoes. I've lived in Kansas for more than 35 years. I've never been outside of the state borders for more than 4-weeks at a stretch. And I've never seen a real tornado in person.

Sure, I've see the coverage and aftermath on TV. On an intellectual level, I know they exist and they can be devastating. But in my heart, I still don't think it can happen to me.

And it doesn't help when we have a bunch of chicken littles with their fingers on the panic button waiting to cry wolf (hurray for mixed metaphors!).

It's a matter of credibility, people.

tagged: Kansas City, Johnson County, weather, tornado, warning, media

Three vasectomies!!!

While you were busy dodging tornadoes and shoveling snow, Michael Scott was having the Best Week EVAR!

TV Quote of the week: "You have no idea of the physical toll that three vasectomies can have on a person!"



tagged: television, TV, The Office, Michael Scott, pop culture, humor, full episode

Veni, Vidi Tony

When I first started blogging a few years ago, I enjoyed checking out Tony's Kansas City for an edgy and entertaining perspective on what's happening in KC.

At the time, blogging was still a relatively new medium. The "mainstream media" hadn't really caught on, and there was a feeling that we were all doing something under the radar.

As time passed, Tony became more popular and he honed his skill at combining the fine art of the female figure with razor sharp commentary on local cultural and political issues. But as he became more and more popular, so the mainstream media began to take notice.

To his credit, Tony was able to leverage the attention of the mainstream media into his own paying gig. It started with a regular spot on a local radio program and reached its highest point last weekend with his first (though certainly not last) appearance on a local television news station.

I'm happy to see this local blogger make the jump to mainstream media. Certainly all the work he puts into writing and editing his online journal will begin to pay off in the form a large advertising contracts.

And, I'm glad to see the local news stations finally coming around to reporting the real news in this town (i.e., what the highly influential blogging community is saying as opposed to the state of the local economy/schools/Westport skanks, etc.).

But most of all, I was glad when I watched the report on the local TV station's website, to see that Tony took the opportunity to dispel the negative Latino stereotypes that so often and unfairly get propagated on the inkernets.
Nicely done Tony. Keep up the good work.

tagged: internet, blog, blogging, Tony's Kansas City, Kansas City, Tony Botello, mainstream media

Race to win

Last night we were watching the season finale of Dancing with the has-beens Stars.

Yes. That's a good question? Why indeed was I watching this show?

I think it was a confluence of several factors, 1) our Time Warner DVR had shot craps the day before and left us with none of the recorded decent programming to fall back on, 2) it was less obnoxious than any other ChickTV programming which, to my primitive male brain, seems to consist of a single show aired seven nights a week under the title Brothers and Grey's Private October Murder Club in Trees, and 3) my head is so congested with my twice-yearly cold that I didn't really give two shits about what was on the teevee.

Anycrap, if your not familiar with the show, they take a professional dancer (WTF?) and pair them with a so-called celebrity and have a dance-off. It's kind of like Michael Jackson's Beat It video, but with lots more latent homosexuality (not that there's anything wrong with that).

So last night, they were down to the final two teams. In one corner, a Russian professional dancer I've never heard of and Melanie Brown, a.k.a. Mel B, a.k.a. Scary Spice.

In the other corner was Indy Car racing champ Helio Castroneves and All-American California girl Julianne Hough.

So with a Russian, a Brazilian and black Brit and a blond-haired, blue-eyed American on the stage, who do you thing the viewing public would vote for.

That's right, the pretty little white girl. Good job USA! Way to vote for the white girl just because she's white! Everybody knows that black people are far superior to white people in dancing. It was clear throughout the night with all of the highlight clips Scary Spice shakin' her money maker.

So here's the American viewing public, keeping it racist since 1789.

tagged: TV, television, Dancing with the Stars, race, Scary Spice, pop culture, Helio Castroneves

View from the couch

There’s been a bit of a lack of substance here lately.

I haven’t felt inspired to blog about the books I’ve been reading (working my way through the Cormac McCarthy library. Up next: No Country for Old Men before the movie is released in November).

Politics lately is so much as usual that there’s really nothing new to say about it (is there ever?). And even my Larry Moore hate has subsided slightly since I haven’t watched the KMBC so-called news cast recently.

Luckily, there’s always pop culture to fall back on, and the new TV lineups provide a great opportunity to see what’s new and original on the small screen. With work letting up a little bit, I’ve had a chance to clear the DVR decks and collect some thoughts on some new fall shows:

• The Bionic Woman: Talk about original! Who would ever have thought to do a remake of a show from the ‘70s that was itself a spinoff of a show from the ‘70s? Brilliant!
  
  The series writers cleverly avoid overestimating the intellectual prowess of the viewing public by steering clear of serious subtext that could be raised with this show: What does it mean to be human in an age of technology. What are the moral limits of performance enhancement. How many times should Sci-Fi show actors be recycled?
  
  Instead, the writing team deftly opts to focus on what viewers really want, sexy cyborgs waging epic pseudo-lesbian wire-fighting battles. Sweeeet.


• JourneyMan: Another stroke of genius and originality. The premise is that a man suddenly begins to leap back and forth in time within his lifetime, assigned by some unknown force to solve problems for people from the past.
  
  I don’t know where these people come up with such original ideas!
  
  Anyway, I was bitterly disappointed when I watched the first episode and realized that this show has nothing at all to do with Steve Perry or a string of chart-topping power ballads from the late-70s to early 80s. But I’m still willing to give it a chance since it stars Kevin McKidd, my favorite Centurion.


• Chuck: A pocket-protected member of the nerd herd inexplicably gets the top secrets of the CIA and NSA stuck in his noggin. So it’s either be killed by your government or be forced to work as a spy for your government.
  
  The theme of this show seems to be "We have met the enemy, and he is us." Aside from a quick mention of the North Koreans, the bad guys in this show seem to be American secret agents. Have the PC police really become so bad that we can no longer bash on the Soviets, North Koreans, Chinese, Iraqis or even the Canadians (damn dirty Canadians!).
  
  The comedy seems to be based on the awkwardness of Chuck, played by Zachary Levi who is a genetic splice of Zack Braff and Jimmy Fallon. There’s that Hollywood originality again. Anyway, for lame premise and lackluster comedy, I predict this show will be cancelled within a few more weeks.


• Big Shots: In the same way that Maxim is Cosmo for men, Big Shots is Desperate Housewives for men. Or rather, its Desperate Housewives about men, but still for women. Instead of smokin’ hot ladies, you get smokin’ hot pretty boys, but all the character types are the same: the goofy one, the sexy one, the smart one and the organized one.
  
  Still, you gotta give credit to a show that kicks off its season featuring a truck stop encounter with a transvestite male prostitute. Another thing I like is that the writers blatantly name the country club (the place where much of the intra-gender dialog takes place) Firmwood, which in terms of not-so-subtle double entendre one-ups the great Bushwood of Caddyshack fame.

So that’s a quick roundup. There are more shows out there, but to be honest you really only need to know about The Office and Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Of course as I’ve stated on other blogs, taking advice on pop culture from me is like taking table manner lessons from Andrew “Dice” Clay, so there’s that.

tagged: TV, television, Bionic Woman, Journeyman, Journey, Steve Perry, Kevin McKidd, Chuck, Zack Braff, Jimmy Fallon, Zachary Levi, Big Shots, The Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Caddyshack

If I were a Simpson

Okay, here's the big reveal. No more anonymity. This is what I look like (in the world of The Simpsons).

Jeeze, I didn't realize I was so creepy looking. And why didn't someone tell me my butt was so big. Time to hop on the exercise bike I guess. But first, just one more pink sprinkled donut.

Mmmmm, doonuutz.

Go create the Simpsons You on the Simpsons movie site and let me know what you look like.

tagged: The Simpsons, movie, donut, cartoon character, pop culture

YouTube Tuesday supplemental: It's finally here!

This is about the funniest thing on TV since that chick on the Newly Wed Game "made whoopie" in the rear.



tagged: movies, YouTube, video, Star Wars, Palpatine, Robot Chicken, humor

The happy Moore on

I knew I should have deleted Letterman.

When I saw that Michael Moore was a guest and he was going to talk about his new "documentary" Sicko, I knew I should have deleted that episode from the DVR and watched a Southpark rerun.

But, I ignored my better judgment just to get a glimpse of the night's Top 10 List. The result of course, is that Moore's hypocritical babbling got my blood up to rant level.

Moore has no credibility in my book. The mere fact that he calls his propaganda films "documentaries" is only one reason. I have no intention of seeing his movie (although, you can see it for free here, if the link still works), but based on his remarks during the Letterman interview, it seems to fit the mold of his previous efforts.

(Yes, I am aware that I seem to be commenting about a movie I haven't seen. So to be clear, my comments are strictly about the interview on Letterman and Moore's characterization of his film during this interview.)

The problem is, as with most of his films, Moore starts with a conclusion (i.e., "health care should be paid for by the gubment") and then sets out to find stories and "evidence" to support his conclusion. When Letterman asks him if his movie is just a series of anecdotes critical of the American health care system, he gives this response.

"I spent most of my time traveling to other countries to find out how we could create a better system here.

In every single other western industrialized country it [universal health care] is underwritten by the government. You never have to worry about it costing anything. It's free for everyone."

That's right. Free.

I was just as amazed at this revelation as you are. It seems countries like France and Germany have found ways to compel health care workers to do their jobs without getting paid. Pharmaceutical companies gladly donate all the prescription drugs needed to ensure good health among the populations.

Of course, Moore knows that nothing is "free". He knows that under a national health care system we would end up paying even more taxes to a notoriously inefficient federal system to get, if we're lucky, the same health care we have now.

As if this wasn't enough, Moore further demonstrated his jerkoffitude while relating the story of his trip to Cuba. He pointed out that prisoners detainees at Guantánamo Bay Naval Base received better health care than people who volunteered to help during the World Trade Center recovery.

I thought, why don't we go get a boat, sail into Guantánamo Bay go right up to the naval station and say "I've got these 9-11 rescue workers here would you give them the same care that you're giving the evildoers. And that's what we did.

Moore goes on to state that he was not received well at the Naval base. Really? Ya think? So you sailed into a U.S. Naval base unannounced and you received a cool reception? Dude, given the location and the geopolitical atmosphere of the day, you're lucky they didn't torpedo you're ass first and ask questions later.

Look, the U.S. health care system has serious problems. I suspect very few people have a good understanding what they are. It's not just about who pays for health care. We have to look at why the costs are spiraling, why is insurance so expensive, why are prescription drugs so expensive? There are a myriad other questions that I don't even know about.

For Moore to sell the idea that "you can have it all for free" ignores the fact that the health care system is a system and needs to be addressed as such.

He had an opportunity to look into these issues objectively and pragmatically to make a truly informative documentary. Of course, he'll sell a lot more tickets and make a lot more money by being an inflammatory douche rather than informative.

tagged: Michael Moore, David Letterman, Sicko, policy, health care, Cuba, Guantánamo Bay

For a smile they can share the night

It was the end of an era.

After eight years of watching Tony Soprano become more and more detestable, after watching him devolve from in insecure villainous letch to a despicable sociopath who cares about nobody - not his wife, kids, friends, sister, uncle - but himself, we were finally going to see him get popped.

After faithfully viewing every uncut episode of what is arguably the defining television program of the decade, we would get to see what we've been waiting for through all the long hiatuses.

We set the DVR (just in case), put the kid to be early and I even made up a Blandwagian Ale for the occasion.
Some of my predictions came true. I predicted that Paulie would turn state's evidence, and I'm not sure sure that didn't happen. I predicted a near-death experience would snap AJ out of his depression (as it did for Tony), although I thought it would be from a shooting rather than his car blowing up.

But I certainly didn't predict that David Chase would lose his stugots when it came to ending the series.

As you already know by now, the final scene built the tension with tight shots of ordinary people inside a diner with the chords of Journey's Don't Stop Believing playing in the background. There was a normal family, a troop of Boy Scouts, just regular people out having dinner. Then the camera would focus malevolently on nefarious looking individuals - a goombah came in alone to sit at the counter, and later a pair of black gangsta-looking fellows.

As Meadow struggles to park her car and the Steve Perry wails "Paying anything to roll the dice just one more time..." the goombah gets up and walks toward Tony, Carmella and AJ, eyeing them with bad intent. At the last minute he turns to walk into the restroom.

The tension is palpable. We're on the edge of our couch cushions just waiting for the universe (or at least Phil Leotardo's crew) to dispense its justice at the muzzle of an untraceable 9 mm Glock.

Then, just as Meadow walks in... the screen goes blank.

What the hell just happened? Did our DVR just malfunction? I frantically begin pushing buttons on the remote to try to diagnose why we lost our picture.

And as the credits begin to roll, I realize that there was no DVR malfunction. We've been had. David Chase sucked us in, got us all excited only to leave me alone and unsatisfied just like Courtney Platte did to me my senior year in high school (different story).

Anyway, I can see Chase's dilemma. There was probably no way he could have written an ending that wouldn't be criticized for the next three weeks. Anything he did would have been a let down, just like when the last Seinfeld episode ran.

But COME ON! You could at least try!

The only explanation, other than Chase's loss of testicular fortitude, is that he wanted to leave the series open for a movie sequel. I guess in that case, Steve Perry would be right: "Oh, the movie never ends It goes on and on and on and on."

tagged: Sopranos, HBO, TV, Journey, David Chase, Steve Perry, pop culture

YouTube Tuesday supplemental: It's not TV

Well we all know that The Sopranos is winding down on Sunday, and with the death of Tony there will be one less watchable program on the tele.

But, I'm pretty stoked about a new series featuring Flight of the Conchords, New Zealand's fourth most popular guitar-based digi-bongo acapella-rap-funk-comedy folk duo.

When we saw the promo a couple of weeks ago, I couldn't wait for the show to air. It turns out, I don't have to. HBO has released the first full episode on their website in advance. Here it is embedded for your entertainment.


tagged: HBO, Sopranos, Flight of the Conchords, TV, video, pop culture

YouTube Tuesday: Next month on ABC

The TV networks have a knack of cancelling the shows I like and making more of the crap I can't stand.

For example, new shows like the excellent The Black Donnellys, Six Degrees and Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip have been canned while I'll be forced to avoid more of the simple-minded Deal or No Deal clones, so-called reality programs or lame stand-up comic based family sitcoms.

It's like the networks want me to use the DVR and Bittorrent to get decent programing.

Anyway, the one bright spot is this pilot episode for an upcoming ABC sitcom: Haunted Lesbian Sorority.



tagged: TV, Haunted Lesbian Sorority, The Black Donnellys, Six Degrees, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, television, pop culture, humor

I could've been a terrorist

One of the TV shows I watch a lot is Boston Legal.

When it first came out a season or two ago, I really liked it. This season? Not so much. I still watch it because there's nothing better during that time slot and what the hell else am I going to do if I don't watch TV.

But the story lines are just getting silly and goofy (a big, black transvestite and a lawyer stuck in a Buzz Lightyear costume? Puleeez!). I should expect as much from a show staring Candice Bergen.

Anyway, one recent episode featured William Shatner's character, Denny Crane, denied air travel to Hawaii because his name is on the federal no-fly list, suing the Office of Homeland Security.

I don't remember much about the episode (it was pretty forgettable) aside from the fact that I kept rolling my eyes at the overly melodramatic diatribes foisted by the actors-playing-lawyers. I guess what I find so irritating is the writers' penchant for finding any issue that is the tiniest bit topical and blowing it way out of proportion for the sake of soap opera drama.

The only reason I bring this up now is that I learned last weekend that I might be a terrorist.

That's right, I've been Denny Craned.

I found out about it when my attempt to use an airline's self-ticketing kiosk at KCI was thwarted by a message to "Please see the ticket agent."

So I had to go back and wait on line to see the airline worker. He took my confirmation number and punched it into his computer. A puzzled look crossed his face as he punched a few more keys and asked for my driver's license.

Then and exclamation of "Aha." A few keystrokes later and I had my boarding pass.

"It turns out your name is on the Federal No-Fly list," he told me.

Immediately I thought to myself "Damn! They're on to me." But before I had a chance to shout "Derka Derka Mohammad jihad!" and make a run for short-term parking, the ticket agent said "I've corrected this. I just had to check your ID and make sure you are who you say you are. In the future when you book your flights you might want to include you're middle initial."

So, it turns out that I'm cleared for takeoff. And I didn't even get to sue Homeland Security.

tagged: Boston Legal, William Shatner, Candice Bergen, terrorist, no fly list, Hadji Girl

Rome (if you want to)

I got an email from my good friend HBO the other day letting me know that Sunday the second and final season of Rome will commence.

The new season picks up on the same day that last season ended, the Ides of March. Ceasar has been stabbed to death by the Senate (I can hear you Democrats squealing with glee), and Niobe, the exotic and beautiful wife of centurion Lucius Vorenus has just committed suicide after her husband learned the truth about her son.

Despite the raft of great shows on network TV this season (Scrubs, The Office, Heroes, Battlestar Galactica) HBO has almost single-networkly been responsible for the best programming on the idiot box.

Shows like The Sopranos, Deadwood and Rome (all of which are ending this year) show a true artistic vision, with snappy writing, realistic scenarios and amazingly beautiful cinematography (especially in HD). They pull no punches and challenge the viewer to pay attention to the complex plot lines. For some views, the complex story lines and inconsistent time lines were a turnoff for Rome in particular. But the payoff is worth it.

Unfortunately, historical dramas like Deadwood and Rome can be pretty expensive, what with building the period sets, procuring costumes, going on location and whatnot.

So it's been a great ride with some amazing programming. It will be sad when it's over, but I look forward to the next big thing they come out with.



tagged: Rome, HBO, TV, pop culture, Deadwood, Battlestar Galactica, Scrubs, The Office