Return of the KGB

It's been a while since we've heard from "them," and you can call me unpatriotic, but I think it's time to bring back the KGB.

This not-so-secret organization has been on hiatus several weeks now. I'm referring of course to the Kansas Guild of Bloggers. The idea (and the clever name) comes from Lyn Perry at Bloging Out Loud.

For some inexplicable (or maybe just unexplained) reason, Lyn has taken a break from organizing the regular KGB Blog Carnival. So, that’s where the rest of us (from Kansas) come in. Let’s keep the weekly roundup of Kansas blog posts going. I’m volunteering to host this week.

Here’s how it works: You submit a blog post to be included in a digest of Kansas-related posts that I'll put up next Monday (April 17). You can send me a link via email of comment to this blog post, but the best way is to submit the post to the Blog Carnival that Lyn set up.

There's even one of those groovy blog-style icons:

So your first assignment as a KGB operative is to submit a blog link to the carnival by 16:00 Kansas Time (that's 4 p.m.) on Sunday, April 15. That's Easter Sunday, so don't wait until the last minute, ya damn slackers!

Your second assignment is to forward a link to this post to any bloggers that you know of in Kansas. Also if you know of any expatriot KGB operatives (bloggers from Kansas who currently live in a foreign country like Italy, Spain, or Texas), make sure they know about this effort as well. We're depending on you to make this thing work.

Your third assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to join the KGB frappr map. You can see it all the way down at the right-hand column of this blog. Keep going, all the way at the bottom. See it? Good. Just click it and follow the instructions to add yourself. This is optional, but it's fun, so just do it.

Okay, you have your orders. Just think of all the traffic you'll get by participating. Don't make me beg. Honestly, that's something you really don't want to see.

tagged: Kansas, blog, blogger, carnival, KGB

Been there

I came across this cute little Google Maps hack the other day that shows the states I've visited. So now that you know where I've been, you can see where I have yet to travel. If you live in one of the gray states, drop me a line and I'll stop by soon (you don't mind me crashing on your couch do you?)


Click here create your own visited states map. There's also one for showing the countries you have visited.

tagged: United States, map, travel

Wrapping it up with Amelie

Well, another Thursday has come and gone, which makes today Friday, which means it's time to play the Amelie Game. I hope you've been keeping track of you're weekly likes and dislikes, because I have.

Here they are:
Dislikes:

• Missouri license plate #175 WGP
• Springing forward (and losing an hour of sleep)
• Throwing good money after bad (for the sake of spoiled millionaires and billionaires).

Likes:

• Free double espresso at Starbucks just for sweet-talking the pretty barrista
• 01:02:03 04/05/06.
• These things (thanks to Joe at Kansas City soil)

Okay, now it's your turn. Leave your likes and dislikes for the week in the comments. And remember, not leaving a comment makes Baby Jesus cry*.

tagged: Amelie, Friday, Starbucks, espresso, Kansas City, littering, barrista

*I'm referring of course to Jesus Hernandez, the two-month-old son of the couple who moved into the house down the street recently. Welcome to the neighborhood, Hernandezes

Holy CrApple!

Apple computers announced today that they will distribute software that will allow you to install Windows on new Macintosh computers.

As a long-time Macintosh and MacOS fan, I'm blown away by this announcement. It just seems so superfluous. I mean, the whole point of buying a Mac is so that you don't have to use that gawd-awful Windoze OS.

Installing Windoze on a Mac is like putting rancid mayonnaise on a perfectly cooked fillet mignon, or spending $80 on a bottle of Brunello, then mixing it with 7-Up. Would you buy a Ferrari then paint a Confederate flag on the roof, install a horn that plays Dixie and call it the General Lee?

I'm trying to think of other things that might be comparable. Being invited to Osama Bin Ladden's nephew's bar mitzva, maybe?

It just doesn't seem right, somehow.

Surely these are the end times.

tagged: Apple, Macintosh, Mac OS, Boot Camp, Microsoft, Windows, Ferrari, Brunello, Osama Bin Laden

Sponsored by the Costanza for Congress campaign

tagged: George Costanza, Seinfeld, humor, life

Butt out

To the female driver of the purple Chevy Impala LS with the Missouri license plate number 175 WGP driving north on Roe Blvd at about 5:15 p.m. on Monday -- I HATE YOUR BUTT!

I try to live by good libertarian values. You leave me alone, I leave you alone. Live and let live, that's what I always say. That's why, when counties and cities consider complete smoking bans, I always say "Whoa! That's a little harsh."

I try to defend the rights of people to kill themselves by whatever means they choose, so long as those means don't include killing (or otherwise harming) anyone else (particularly me).

But dammit Female Missouri Smoker, you make it really hard when you throw your cigarette butt out your car window right in front of me!

As a militant extremist environmentalist, one of my biggest pet peeves is people who litter. And believe me, smokers are among the worst. I can stop at any intersection in the metro area and find a boat load of cigarette butts lying in the street and gutters.

Now, I don't object to people smoking in their cars (as long as I'm not in the car with them), but put your butts out in the ash-tray, ashhole! Hell, I enjoy my drug of choice in the car all the time, but I don't throw used coffee cups out my window.

I've considered getting one of those LED message marquees installed in my car so I could send a message to smokers who throw their butts out the window. But since I'm not technical enough to figure that out, and since it would just be a distraction and probably cause and accident anyway, I've opted for this blog post.

So if you know the Female Missouri Smoker with a purple Chevy Impala LS with license plate number 175 WGP, or if you are that person and your reading, here's a message:

If you're going to come to Kansas, keep your dirty butt in your car!

tagged: Kansas, Missouri, smoker, smoking, cigarette, butt, litter, environmentalist, environment

YouTube Tuesday: Clerks II

Kevin Smith's Clerks came out the year I graduated from college. The low-budget film (made for under 30 grand) was the first of a series of movies by Smith that were all set in the same universe of New Jersey.

Now, 12 years later, Smith shows us what happened in the lives of loser clerks Dante and Randall in Clerks II.

As with Seinfeld, Peal Jam, Napster (the original) and irrational exuberance, I have warm spot in my heart for Dante and Randall, which means I'll probably go see this movie for the sentimental value alone.

And, chances are I'll be disappointed. You can never go back again (unless you're VH1).

Anyway, here's the trailer from YouTube.



tagged: Kevin Smith, Clerks, YouTube, 90s, Seinfeld, Pearl Jam, Napster, irrational exuberance, movies, pop culture

Let 'em eat gâteau

So the French are protesting again (big surprise) and it looks like the government might be about to surrender (another big surprise) to demands by lazy students to mandate low productivity in the French economy.

As you might have heard, French President Jacques Chirac signed a law that makes it easier for French business to fire slackers if they don't shape up.

France has one of Europe's highest youth unemployment rates. More than 20% of French 18 to 25-year-olds are unemployed - double the national average of 9.6%.

Obviously, a business (particularly a small business) isn't too keen to hire someone if there's no way to fire them when they just sit around all day not bathing and writing blog entries.

This is a good object lesson for those stateside who have put European Socialism up on a pedestal. The kind of Nanny State (or should I say Au Pair State) that France has become has bred a bunch of spoiled brats who see job security as an entitlement, a one way street where their employer owes them a job regardless of their (lack of) work performance and personal hygiene.

Ironically, if the French youth burning cars in protest of the employment measures would put the same energy into their jobs, they probably wouldn't have to worry about being fired in the first place.


tagged: France, French, labor, Europe, EU, employment, Youth

K...S...U... WILDCATS!

It's Sunday, so this is old news by now, but I just wanted to note that there is still a major college in Kansas where they play championship basketball.

It's not Wichita, for the Cinderella Shockers alas were eliminated in the Sweet 16 of the NCAA Tournament.

And, of course it's not Lawrence, unless you count an annual self-wetting to a better B school (this year it happened to be Bradley in the first round of the NCAA Tourney).

Yes, the city I'm talking about is Manhattan, the Little Apple, where the Lady Wildcats showed last Friday night that they have the biggest basket balls in the state. Even though their Y-chromosomed counterparts failed to make it past the first round of the conference tournament, the ladies showed true testicular fortitude in downing Marquette in the WNIT championship game.

I know those of the Crimson and Blue persuasion will try to belittle the achievement, saying it's better to lose in the first round of the NCAA than to win the NIT championship. But I attribute that to bitterness and sour grapes, two great taste that go great in Lawrence.

So big congrats to the 'Cats for representing not only the Purple, but also Kansas. Here's a special tribute to you:

GO CATS!

tagged: basketball, Kansas, KSU, WNIT, Shockers, WSU, Bradley

Amelie Friday

In case you haven't noticed, it's Friday again. So let's play the Amelie Game.

If this is you're first time, here are the rules: three likes and three dislikes from the previous week. I'll start with dislikes:

Dislikes:

• Slow elevators
• When people only go up one floor on the slow elevator (instead of taking the stairs)
• When you get on the slow elevator and have to stop on every freakin' floor before you get to your own.

Likes:

• Chapstick on my nose when I have a cold (thanks for the tip, 'echelle. It worked like a charm!)
• Hive7 - This new web metaphor is still pretty useless, but also hellacool. Check out my "room" at EmawKC's Crab Shack.
• Surplus Exchange- Thanks for the comments, links and emails that tipped me off to this place, I'll be stopping by tomorrow to donate the old Mac-clone.

Okay, now it's your turn. Leave your likes and dislikes in the comments. Wise asses are especially encouraged to reply.

tagged: Amelie, elevator, Hive7, surplus, chapstick, likes, dislikes