Tick talk

I visited my ancestral home last weekend to attend the graduation of my niece.

We stayed with my parents in the home where I grew up, in the heart of Kansas' Flint Hills. It's always nice going back there visit. My childhood home is in a wooded area next to a stream. The house was originally built in 1875 on a plot of ancient river bottom that also was home to apple and pear orchards and vineyards. Even today, two 100-year old pear trees still bear fruit every fall.

It was a great environment to grow up in. The hills and woods provided an ample supply of communists for a 12-year-old and his friends to hunt and kill in our quest to repel a Red Dawn-type of Russian invasion (nowdays, kids probably fight off imaginary Islamoradicals. Well, actually, they're probably too busy playing Grand Theft Auto IV to spend anytime using their imaginations and being out-of-doors, but that's a different post).

I like taking my daughter there, fishing in the stream and hiking in the woods. Spotting giant herons, crawdads, bullfrogs and snakes.

We did all that this passed weekend. But my nostalgia had filtered out a certain little menace.

The ticks.

They seem to be particularly thick and bad this year. Saturday, getting ready for bed, I picked a middle sized one off my Supermodel Wife's lower back. The next day I found one crawling across my jeans.

The kiddo didn't escape the pestilence either. During bath time Sunday morning, I saw what looked like a mole on her chest. But I didn't remember seeing a mole there before.

"Come closer and let me check out that spot, I think it might be a tick, " I told her.

Not what she wanted to here.

"I don't what you to look at it because I'm afraid if you look at it it will be a tick," she said, worried almost to tears.

I called in reinforcements in the form of my Supermodel Wife, who checked out the spot while I held the kid still. Sure enough, a tiny tick had started it's bloodsucking activities on the flesh of my daughter.

We picked the little bugger off and with the minor emergency over went about attending the day's graduation activities.

But for the entire rest of the day I couldn't shake the feeling of tiny insect legs crawling all over me.

tagged: wildlife, tick, Flint Hills, parenting

Package deal

I don't know about you, but I have a huge economic stimulus package.

I was admiring it the other day after taking it out of its wrapping. If you’re single, and you don’t have kids, chances are your economic stimulus package is no where near as big as mine.

Don’t feel bad though. Not everyone is endowed with such a large economic stimulus package. If you happen to have a small economic stimulus package, I hear there a many programs out there that can help you make the most of it.

For example, I saw an ad on The Home Depot website a couple of days ago saying they could help you stretch your economic stimulus package. It probably means buying one of their cheap hoes, so I won’t be taking advantage of that (let’s face it, I’m too old and dignified for that sort of thing). But it might be an option for some of you.

You can also get your stimulus package to last longer by going to Branson, Mo. According to their website, they are offering a number of services to extend your economic stimulus package.

Personally, I'll be giving my full economic stimulus package to my Supermodel Wife. She is particularly talented at getting the most out of my economic stimulus package. I actually enjoy the experience of having her take hold of the economic stimulus package and putting it to good use.

Regardless of the size of your economic stimulus package, it's important to remember that it's there to be enjoyed. And don't forget, the entire country is counting on all of us making use our economic stimulus packages.

So even if you have a tiny economic stimulus package, don't just leave it tucked away in a dark place somewhere gathering dust. Take it out and enjoy it.

tagged: economy, economic, stimulus, package, tax, Home Depot, Branson

YouTube Tuesday: Subprime

Just when I was about ready to give up on This American Life for being too preachy, sanctimonious and full of themselves, I heard their excellent report on the subprime/credit crisis that threatens to plunge the world economy into a recession.

They do an excellent job explaining how we got to where we are, but John Bird and John Fortune are much funnier.



tagged: movie, YouTube, video, subprime, crisis, This American Life, economy, mortgage

Monday's child

I want to post a special and heartfelt congratulations to my little bro, Boomer, on the announcement of his soon-to-be adopted baby son.

Boomer and his supermodel wife have been trying to adopt a child for a long time (years). I'm sure it's been a long and at times frustrating wait for them, but I can't think of two people more deserving of a son, and I know they'll make great parents.

I can't wait to meet the little guy, born last Monday (fair of face).

This is dedicated to the little fella, who has already brought a lot of happiness into the world.

If
Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

tagged: family, adoption, son, Rudyard Kipling, if

O'RLLY

This is a great take from Barely Political on the now infamous 20-year-old Bill O'Reilly meltdown...


tagged: movie, YouTube, video, politics, Barely Political, Bill O'Reilly, meltdown, media

Friday Blogthing: The beat goes on

Here's more proof of the inaccuracy of online quizzes...

What Your Taste in Music Says About You

Your musical tastes are reflective and complex. You are intellectual to the point of being cerebral. You are very open to new experiences, and even more open to new ideas and theories. Wisdom and personal accomplishment are important to you. You are naturally sophisticated. You are drawn to art, especially art by independent artists. You are likely to be financially well off... and not because you were born that way.

What Does Your Taste in Music Say About You?

tagged: Friday, blogthing, music, style, quiz, blog, meme

Book Report: Shakedown

Title: Shakedown

Author: Joel Goldman

Synopsis:
Kansas City FBI Agent Jack Davis cuts corners and calls in favors to piece together seemingly unrelated clues in a mass murder while battling a debilitating nerve condition that has cost him his job.

My thoughts:
This blog has benefited me in a number of ways. It has allowed me to meet some really fun and talented people. It has given me a creative outlet (though, admittedly, the "creative" bit is debatable). But the real reason I started it is to try to get free stuff.

My first score on this point was a review copy of the That Thing You Do director's cut.

And most recently when I received an invitation to review Shakedown by local author and trial lawyer Joel Goldman I jumped at the opportunity. Who am I to turn down a free review copy of the book?

Shakedown is Goldman's fifth book and takes place in various neighborhoods throughout the greater Kansas City area. Genre-wise, I guess you would call it a crime/suspense thriller, which isn't really what I usually go for. Still I was excited to dive in and give it an honest try.

I was a little concerned in the first couple of chapters where the author used, in my opinion clumsily, a written street vernacular for the inner dialogs of some minor characters. This was soon forgiven though, as I came to appreciate the pace of action in the story.

I also appreciated Goldman's use of the Kansas City area as a character device in the novel. He does an excellent job of describing the different neighborhoods, from the tough and gritty Quindaro, Strawberry Hill and the rail yards in Argentine to the upscale Country Club Plaza shopping district and the suburbs of Johnson County.

Goldman also peppers in several literary Easter Eggs for his Kansas City readers. The main character, for example, uses the alias of "Detective Funkhouser" in some scenes, an obvious reference to the KCMO mayor.

I also was interested in the way Goldman incorporated aspects of another book I recently read, Malcom Gladwell's Blink. One of the main characters is an expert in the Facial Action Coding System (which Gladwell discusses in detail in his book) and uses this skill to help solve the murder. But it ends up costing her.

The writing is solid and the narrative tight enough to keep me turning the pages. I thought the plot was a bit contrived at times, and several sequences were easily predicted.

But I’d still give it a solid recommendation for your summer reading list, especially for those of you in Kansas City. Add it to your beach bag or take it on that road trip. It’s a good read.

Rating: Recommended summer/beach reading

Note: Read more 3AM Book Reviews.

tagged: books, literature, Joel Goldman, Shakedown, review, Kansas City, Quindaro, Strawberry Hill

Malcom in the middle

Speaking of The New Yorker, I saw a video excerpt from its recent "Stories from the Near Future" conference.

The excerpt caught my eye because it is a presentation by author Malcolm Gladwell, whom I wrote about recently.

Gladwell is as fascinating as a speaker as he is as a writer. I think part of that has to do with the fact that he looks like a Saturday Night Live character, or a human version of a muppet.

Eddie Muphy's Buckwheat meets Jimmy Fallon's IT guy.

His topic deals with why so often the wrong people are hired for the job, from teachers to policemen to presidents of the United States. It's much more interesting than it sounds so go check it out at the link above if you have some time over lunch.

tagged: The New Yorker, Malcolm Gladwell, Saturday Night Live

YouTube Tuesday: Toast to Hillary

The presidential campaign of the last two years really has me worn out. I still haven't decided which of the three democrats still in the race (Obama, Clinton and McCain) I could vote for.

It seems like the Democratic party, in it's quest to squelch democracy, is really putting the pressure on Hillary to drop out of the race. Evidently according to the Party Bosses, the gajillions of people who support Clinton don't really deserve to have their votes counted.

Be that as it may, I've been enjoying the Naked Campaign series from The New Yorker illustrator Steve Brodner. In his latest webisode, he toasts Hillary's campaign...



tagged: movie, YouTube, video, politics, campaign, Hillary Clinton, Naked Campaign, democrats

RE: Your Brains

Props to Zach for snagging some horrific pictures of the Kansas City Zombie Walk in Westport.

Go check out the ghouly images. It's yet another example of local bloggers breaking important news stories that the mainstream media are afraid to cover.

Also, in honor of the event, here's another apropos song by Jonathan Coulton...


tagged: Kansas City, Wetport, zombie, brains, Jonathan Coulton