YouTube Tuesday: Spillicious

Well, we're way passed the 50-day mark with this oil spill business and it's enough to cause a Chief Executive to drop expletives in public.

I've still got the germ of a post about this mess in my head. Not sure if it will ever be published, but I did like this video peak at the internal workings of a British Petroleum board room.



tagged: YouTube, Tuesday, British Petroleum, BP, Gulf of Mexico, oil, spill, coffee

Two cups, one gack

I recently discovered a flaw in my morning routine.

A typical work-a-day morning for me goes something like this: Get up, get ready for work, drop off the kids, stop by QT for a coffee and fruit (can't forget breakfast), drive to work, park car, arrive at my cube, turn on computer, drink coffee, start work.

It's a pretty good, streamlined routine. There are various sub-steps along the way, but you get the idea. It has worked pretty flawlessly for ages now.

Until yesterday. I discovered a rather nasty flaw stemming from my coffee subroutine.

The coffee subroutine involves me grabbing one of my half-dozen or so insulated travel coffee mugs on the way out the door. After dropping of the kids, I take my mug to the QuikTrip for a refill of Colombian Supremo with a squirt of non-fat creamer.

So far so good, right? I drink the coffee on the way to work and throughout the firs few meetings of the morning. The problem is, I don't always bring the mugs home everyday after work. And a couple of them are identical.

Yeah. You see where this is going.

Yesterday I bring my morning cup of joe into my cube. For illustration purposes, it looks pretty much like this (because this is what it is).

As per usual, I set it on my desk to take out my laptop computer and get it started. I take off my jacket and hang it up. Then as I'm sitting down in my office chair, I grab my cup of coffee and take a big swig. But I've inadvertently set it down next to yesterday's coffee mug...

Let me just say that it's no pleasant realization when you're expecting the warm rich taste of roasted Colombian java beans to get the cold bitter nastiness from the previous day. Luckily I came to the horrible realization before I swallowed, and immediately spit the offending liquid back into the cup.

But obviously, I've got to scar, mar or otherwise deface one of the cups. This can't happen again. This aggression will not stand, man.

tagged: coffee, QuikTrip, mug, gag, Colombian Supremo

Mugged

I've kind of been bringing my own coffee in to work a lot lately.

Our office coffee is that vacuum packed Folgers stuff. Frankly, it's not that good. And it's become a general practice in my block of cubes to double the dose of Folgers when whoever-it-is makes a new pot. The flawed logic seems to be that if a single dose is bad, then two doses will be good.

Anyway I sort of ignored the last 1/3 of a cup of coffee in my work mug for the last two weeks or so, drinking instead from several travel mugs that I fill up with decent coffee before work.

Well I today I just happened to glance over at my mug to discover that all of the liquid has evaporated out, leaving only coffee crust and a thick, inky sludge at the bottom of the cup.

Note the rings of crust rising about a third of the way up the inside of the glass. It must be some kind of indication of how well the dehumidifiers work in my office. I mean, that's a lot of liquid to just vanish into thin air.

Here's a better view looking down into blackness at the bottom of the mug.


I'm thinking about letting it dry all the way out, then adding hot water to see if I can reconstitute it. Does coffee work like that?

tagged: coffee, mug, office, work, Folgers

Hey, there's risk in everything

So yeah, like I said yesterday I taught my kid to make coffee for me in the morning. No big whoop, right?

Well, I received this email today from Phillips, makers of the Senseo single-serve coffee machine I use.

Dear Valued Customer:

SENSEO® COFFEE MAKER

Philips has identified a safety problem which affects a number of Senseo® coffee makers produced between July 2006 & November 2008. Philips is committed to the well-being of its consumers and has decided to voluntarily recall the affected Senseo® machines and offer a replacement unit.

Affected units can be identified by model type, manufacturing location and production date. Please refer to the information below. Only units that meet the criteria in all categories are under recall:

Models: HD7810, HD7811, HD7815, HD7820, HD7832 and HD7890.

Manufacture Country and Date: units made in Poland from 0627 to 0847 and units made in China from 0727 to 0847

Colors: Black, Blue, Silver, Red, White

Unaddressed calcification in the coffeemaker from use of hard or medium water, when combined with an external electrical fault, can lead to obstruction of the overpressure release system causing boilers to suddenly separate possibly leading to injury. Per year, the risk is less than three per million and there have been no reported cases in the United States.

Philips would like to advise consumers as follows:

1 Please look at the sticker on the base plate of your Senseo® machine to identify the model number, manufacturing location and production week.

2 Please visit www.senseoexchange.com or call the toll-free phone number 1-866-604-0051 to register your product and receive further instructions and how to receive a free replacement unit. We intend to replace affected units with the same model product.

We wish to thank you for your cooperation and apologize for any inconvenience.

Kind regards,
Philips Consumer Care

Okay, so maybe it's a little more risky that I thought. On the other hand, when has anyone ever died from an exploding pressure chamber?

Sure, there was that time my cousin Jeffrey (who works for the NYC Parks & Rec department, btw) was seriously injured in a boiler explosion. In fact it blew the entire left side of his body off. Don't worry though. Jeffrey recovered. He's all right now.

tagged: coffee, Senseo, recall

This having a kid thing is finally starting to pay off

I know some of you out there are completely anti-kid. And I must concede that in theory you have a point.

Who needs the staying up all night taking care of a hungry screaming baby. Or the added expenses of childcare and tiny socks and booster seats for cars and special biohazard trashcans designed for radioactive diapers.

But I can tell you that after a few years, these things start to pay dividends as you begin to reap the reward for all of the time you spent on the rigorous child training program.

For example, our kindergarten-age kid is becoming a convenient time-saving device for me. About a week ago I taught her how to make me my morning cup of coffee.

Since I'm the only coffee drinker in the family, I have one of those single serving coffee makers from Senseo (that I got virtually for free). And using a Senseo is so easy a child can do it -- which is kind of the point here.

So I walked the kid through all of the coffee making steps. I showed her where the coffee pods are kept in the upper cupboard and how to avoid being impaled on the rack of steak knives while climbing onto the counter to retrieve the pods.

I showed her how to fill the water reservoir on the coffee maker with scalding hot water from the kitchen sink.

I showed her how to place the pods in the coffee maker and clamp down the locking lid, how to press the appropriate buttons and set the coffee mug under the steaming streams of coffee, and how to carefully carry the mug of hot java to me without burning her fingers.

So for the last few mornings, I've had a nice hot cup of coffee ready for me when I get to the kitchen.

Child labor, ain't it grand?

tagged: family, coffee, Senseo, labor, parenting

Top Ten Thursday: Hot and Black

Well, I don't mind telling you it's been a rough couple of days.

I'm not going to bitch and moan about my early Christmas present (a severe head cold that has me going through life in slow motion these days). I'll just say that I needed a few extra cups of coffee to get me off of Square One this morning.

Which brings me to today's Top Ten Thursday category: Top 10 Songs About Coffee.

And lucky you, it's an audio Top 10! Here's the playlist:



And, for those of you who are reading this in an RSS reader (you should click to listen), here's the track list:

Top 10 Songs About Coffee:
10) Coffee is my cup of tea -- Lardpony

9) Coffee -- Dave Miller

8) Coffee -- David Allen Coe

7) Taylor, The Latte Boy -- Kristin Chenoweth

6) Two Beds and a Coffee Machine -- Savage Garden

5) Starfish and Coffee -- Prince

4) One More Cup of Coffee -- Bob Dylan

3) Java Jive -- The Manhattan Transfer

2) Black Coffee -- Ella Fitzgerald

1) Cigarettes and Coffee -- Otis Redding

tagged: coffee, song, Java, Otis Redding, Ella Fitzgerald, Bob Dylan, Top Ten

haiku

staycation over
back to work today, monday
please pass the coffee

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tagged: work, coffee, staycation, Monday, haiku

Cool change

So I walk in to Starbucks across the street yesterday for my customary afternoon double espresso.

I give the barrista my order, make a little small talk and whip out the two bucks to pay for my tiny cup of concentrated caffeine.

As you know, a double espresso at Starbucks costs about a $1.85. I typically give two dollars and tell the kid behind the counter to drop change into the tip jar.

I'm guessing the barrista knew this, because when he rang up my charge the register showed that I was owed change of $9,999.12. Some tip!

tagged: Starbucks, coffee, tip, change, barrista, dollar

Memo RE: The coffee machine

TO: Coworkers on my floor
FROM: emawkc
RE: The Coffee Machine

Dear coworkers,
This memo is to remind you of how easy it is to start a new pot of coffee in the break room.

I understand that some of you have an inferior education, that remedial skills in following simple instruction weren't required to get a diploma from the University of Kansas.

But common decency and regard for the caffeine addictions of your coworkers demands that you learn the basic steps for starting a new pot of coffee after you take the last cup.

So let me explain:

• Step one - open a new pre-measured packet of coffee and pour it into the filter
• Step two - put the filter (with coffee therein) into the coffee machine between the place where the water comes out and the thing that the coffee goes into
• Step three - press the "start" button
• Step four - Put your tongue back in your mouth you drooling idiot!

Sorry if this memo is a little harsh, I'll be in better humor after I've had my coffee.

tagged: office, rant, coffee, humor

Not my cup of tea

I saw this report on ABC last night, so I automatically question it's veracity.

But since it contained information that was favorable to me, I give it the benefit of the doubt.

The report basically helps enable my drug habit by touting the potential benefits of the chemical compounds found in coffee (both decaff and the regular kind).

From the story:

"Mounting evidence suggests all those lattes and cappuccinos might not only improve your mood, they might also improve your health. Daily cups of coffee have been linked to a reduced risk of Parkinson's disease, liver cancer, gallstones, and type 2 diabetes."

Furthermore, the same studies show that the more coffee you drink, the more health benefits you get.

With that in mind, I've decided to take on a mid-year's resolution to quadruple my coffee intake. So for my daily lunch break, I'm now going to have four double espressos from Starbucks instead of just the one.

The beauty of this is that because I'm doing this for my health, I can use my healthcare reimbursement account to pay for the daily doses.

Just d-d-d-don't be surp-p-prised is I st-t-tart acting a lit-t-t-tle jit-t-t-tery.

tagged: coffee, caffeine, Starbucks, venti, drug, cappuccino, espresso, health, diabetes

Instant coffee karma

Last week I blogged about an incident at Starbucks where a guy I thought was pretty cool turned out to be a complete douchebag when dealing with the servers.

I remarked that you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat workers in the service industry. And because we are known by the company we keep, I made a point to speak with the Starbucks employee before I left.

Fast forward to today. I walk into the Starbucks for my daily dopio and there behind the bar is the intrepid barista from last week. I place the order, pay my two bucks and wait for the dark liquid courage.

When I pick up the demitasse at the counter, it came with a voucher for a free Starbucks beverage of my choice. Those of you who frequent Starbucks know that, depending on what beverage I choose, this voucher could be worth up to $150.

This incident made me think of something my dad used to tell me. My dad is a very wise man, wiser than I could ever hope to be. And he tried to share this wisdom with me and my siblings as we were growing up.

He told us that one of the immutable laws of the universe is that when you do something nice for someone, they feel an obligation to do something nice for you in return.

They may not actually do anything nice. But nonetheless they feel the obligation, however slight. Likewise the converse is true. If you crap on someone, they feel an obligation to crap right back on you.

This is all pretty simple, it's the whole "do unto others" shtick that others have come up with. But it amazes me how easy it is to not be an asshole and the tangible benefits you can get by being decent.

tagged: Starbucks, coffee, dopio, espresso, barrista, karma

Cold shot

I grabbed a seat in the comfy chair at Starbucks after retrieving my daily double espresso.

There was a big fellow sitting in the neighboring comfy chair listening, I presume, to voicemail message on his mobile phone. When he was finished, he gave a squint-eyed looked at my demitasse.

"What are you drinkin," he asked

"Dopio espresso."

"That's what I thought," he replied. "Don't see many people order that drink. Now you need to drink it like the Italians do, all in one gulp."

That led to a conversation about Italy and our travels there. Turns out the roundish, baldish, oldish guy's parents were from Napoli and he still has a brother living there.

I was enjoying the conversation, reminiscing and comparing travel notes, when the signore gave another squint-eyed look, this time at the young Starbucks employee who was sweeping the floor nearby. The dustpan he was using was making a small but noticeable racket.

"Hey. Excuse me," the Signore said. No response from the sweeping .

"Hey! Buddy! Why don't you go work somewhere else so we can talk here," said the Signore.

The barrista shot him a cold-cup-of-coffee stare, but then tried to laugh off the insult. "I know," he said. "I'll be done in a minute."

"No. Go and finish up somewhere else and then come back" was the reply.

"I'm sorry sir. I'm just doing my job. If I go somewhere else it will just disturb them. I'm working my way through the store."

"But I don't see why you can't give us a minute to finish talking," the Signore said.

"I'm sorry sir. This is my job. You can talk to my manager if you want," said the barrista.

He moved on with his sweeping and was soon in another part of the coffee shop. Signore and I continued to talk for a few more minutes before I finished my dopio and he needed to leave. But I have to admit, my estimation of him had fallen a few notches and the conversation wasn't as enjoyable.

You can really tell a lot about someone by the way they treat people in the service industry.

Before I left, I made sure to go talk to the barrista and slip him an extra buck. Not a ton of money, but then money wasn't the point. I just wanted the guy to know that some of us believe in being decent to each other.

UPDATE: Here's the rest of the story...

tagged: Starbucks, coffee, dopio, espresso, barrista, Italy

Drug of choice

Dave at To Be The Man writes that he has vowed to give up caffeine and quit going to Starbucks this year.

My only question is... Why Dave? What do you got against caffeine?

Among all of the addictive substances, caffeine is pretty minor. I mean, it is the most popular drug in the world. Ninety percent of Americans consume it in some form every day. And besides, you're not really at risk for any long-term affects of too much caffeine.

Long-term effects of a toxic nature do not appear evident when regular caffeine use is below about 650 mg a day - equivalent to about eight or nine average cups of coffee.

So what, is it just the financial impact of having coffee at Starbucks? Is that it?

If so, let me direct you to a recent article in The Slate that might ease the financial pain while allowing you to continue to imbibe in your vice. According to the article:

They will serve you a better, stronger cappuccino if you want one, and they will charge you less for it. Ask for it in any Starbucks and the barrista will comply without batting an eye.

The drink in question is the elusive "short cappuccino"—at 8 ounces, a third smaller than the smallest size on the official menu, the "tall," and dwarfed by what Starbucks calls the "customer-preferred" size, the "Venti," which weighs in at 20 ounces and more than 200 calories before you add the sugar.

The short cappuccino has the same amount of espresso as the 12-ounce tall, meaning a bolder coffee taste, and also a better one.

So, Dave, don't give up on the dream. You can and should stay addicted to coffee. Quick, get me a shot of espresso. Make it a double.
tagged: coffee, caffeine, Starbucks, venti, drug, cappuccino, espresso

Cyber Swag!

Or, "Holy crap! It actually worked!!"

About a month ago I heard an Internet rumor that Senseo, a single serve coffee joint venture of Sara Lee and Phillips electronics, was giving away free coffee makers as part of a promotion.

Knowing from previous experience the value of Internet rumors (man, that was one crazy Yom Kippur!), I was very skeptical. But I went to the Drop the Drip website to learn more.

So the deal was, you send in a picture of your old coffee maker (plus $15 shipping and handling, of course) and Senseo sends you a "free" Senseo Single Serve coffee maker -- a $60 value.

The website seemed legit, so I snapped a pic of my Bodum French Press with my trusty Sprint camera phone and clicked upload. All that was left was the small matter of handing my VISA card number over to an internet form and waiting.

Well, to my surprise, my shiny new red Senseo coffee maker arrived today. Can't wait to fire it up and drink myself into a caffeine-induced epileptic fit.

tagged: Senseo, coffee, Sprint, cell phone, Phillips