Thursday, September 06, 2007

Troop surge

I'm about a week late on this, but it's something I wanted to get off my to-blog list.

The LJW posted a video report about recruiting problems at the Kansas Highway Patrol.

For various reasons (more people in the military, more people retiring) there are fewer qualified applicants to join the KHP (or, as I call them, KHiPs). One of the biggest issues is that the applicants they get can't pass the written and physical tests.

At first I wondered how tough it could be. I mean, I know how to drive. If the written test is anything like the open book test I took to get my driver's license when I was 14, I shouldn't have any problem with it.

And as far as the physical test goes, hell how tough can it be? It's not like you have to be an American Gladiator to sit behind the steering wheel all day drinking coffee and eating donuts.

But then I realized that the KHP is being smart and planning ahead. With oil reserves drying up by the day, the KHP realizes that it has to set higher standards for its troopers in order to deal with the coming apocalyptic dystopia.

Physical standards are being raised. The highway of the socially decayed future will require men of great stamina and strength. Marksmanship will be a key skill, as these new troops attempt not only to uphold the law, but to dispense justice and vengeance as well.

In their new roles as judge, juror and executioner, Kansas will need the best of the best.

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1 comment:

  1. Years ago, I had a client who was/is a captain in the KHP. I have a KHP coffee mug, T-shirt and "Junior Trooper" badge. Maybe I'll swing out to Topeka and sign up. I've still got to pick up the jodhpurs and Sam Brown Belt, though.

    Cheers.

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